The Wisdom Mirror of Nature: December
Each month of the year is an invitation to your True Nature — have you accepted it? This series of short essays offers a way “back” to you. Welcome to the healing darkness of December.
How reconnecting with Nature and its cycles can support you
We all know intellectually that we are part of Nature, made of the same elements and following the same laws of birth, life and death. Yet as human animals, we have a unique and beautiful tool called mind, which helps us attempt to dissociate experientially from this simple truth. I say “attempt to”, because this dissociation doesn’t fully work and that’s a blessing.
Our life does come to an end and for me, this mortality is the greatest teacher. When I manage to dissociate from this simple fact and avoid the fear of death, I live on autopilot — as if my life and the lives of those I love are going to last forever. They won’t. This impermanence of things teaches me to be present in this moment, to stop postponing things to an imaginary future, to live this life fully as if this is my last day here. It might be. How would I spend this last day? Would I dwell in regret or ponder a 3-year plan? Probably not.
In much the same vein, since we are made of Nature, our life follows four long stages - the four seasons. It starts with our early months and years in the womb of Winter, completely helpless and dependent, through the spring and individuation of our youth, the expansion, growth and maturity of summer, the harvest and decay of autumn and back to death and silence of winter.
Needless to say, these stages occur at different times for each of us. Yet in our Western societies, this natural connection is largely severed and replaced by an artificially imposed school, working and retirement age.
We all have felt to some degree the pain of our bodies and psyches not matching the societal life calendar: the child that was too young for school, the adolescent that still felt like a child, the young man or woman who felt pressed by societal expectations of family, career and children, the mature person who felt exhausted and ready to rest earlier than required…
This same disconnection between our cyclical bodies and minds happens every year. As facets of Nature, our emotional & physical bodies feel (consciously or not) the pull of the seasons, yet our minds are in service of yearly goals, corporate calendar, short-term and long-term business and personal plans.
Though we may not be aware of this disconnect, we feel its effects as being out of balance — exhausted, anxious, moody or confused. And what a blessing! These very feelings can be a dharma bell to look within and re-establish the lost connection. In other words, return to balance.
This series of short essays is an invitation to use the wheel of the seasons in the outer world as a wisdom mirror to see, understand more deeply and tend to what is happening in our inner world. In truth, there is no “inner” and “outer” — these are mere distinctions of the mind. Letting go of these artificial distinctions is the beginning of health and natural wisdom.
The Wisdom of December
Without further ado, let’s begin where we are. The theme that I like to use every year for our December yoga & mindfulness immersions is called Healing Darkness. Not that there is any darkness to heal, but that the darkness itself is healing. As the days become shorter, December is an invitation to retreat from the world of lights, objects, intentions and into the womb of the night of winter.
For many of us, this time of the year may feel challenging. It is somewhat in-built in our bodies — after all, a few generations ago, our ancestors didn’t really know whether they would survive the harsh winter conditions. Naturally, the darkness and cold outside can stir discomfort and difficult feelings within us. It is equally natural to seek a return to comfort, warmth and ease.
And if this is what you feel is needed for you, I encourage you to look after yourself wholeheartedly. At the societal level, this urge to comfort ourselves in the darkness is very much reflected in our Christmas decoration, lighting and shopping. But if you feel called & curious, you can go one step deeper. You can stop distracting yourself, leave all comfort and turn your gaze towards the darkness itself.
December is an invitation back into the original dark womb, where we can meet ourselves fully — naked, stripped of definitions, unembellished, unfixed, imperfect, struggling, scared, hurting, broken. It’s a possibility to shine the light of our attention where it is needed and move towards these places rather than away from them. Instead of ignoring them, we can allow them to be and simply ask them “What do you need? How can I support you?”.
I’ve learnt and keep learning through my practice as a therapist and human being that the more we ignore these corners of our psyche, the more they command our lives in many unconscious ways. They show their hydro-like head when we expect them the least in cycles of repeated suffering.
To pay attention is all that is needed. And this attention IS love — it is the ultimate act of courage, self-care and self-compassion. As we tend to ourselves in this loving way, without judgement, agenda or expectations, we break the cycle of self-abandonment and return home to our wholeness. Then there is no “inner” and “outer” and no division within ourselves.
From that womb of wholeness, we can be reborn into the light of Christmas or the Winter Solstice — fresh, immaculate, whole as we’ve always been. May we be whole, free and happy. May all beings be at peace. Happy December to you.
